Saturday, December 04, 2004

It was fun at Charlie's birthday celebration. She works with my best bud Hector at the pub and she has this really hot South African bf, haha. I drank quite a lot but really wasn't too drunk towards the end. That's teh great thing about London, since the pubs close early (11pm, Geez!) everybody starts drinking at like 7pm and by the time you're shit-faced, it's only like 10 or 11, hahaha. But this time I was not, and I was heading home anyways. Btw, I absolutely LOVE Bloody Marrys, they ROCK! Hahaha.

Since I had bought a travelcard (a pass that lets you go on the Tube [London subway] and buses all you want for one day), I decided to take de Tube home for a change. Waiting for the damn bus to pass is sometiems a tad tedious. So I go into Covent Garden station (which is so deep undergound, taking the stairs is the equivalent of going down a 15 story building! Yikes!). Thankfully my train comes by quickly and as I'm lookign for an empty car I spot someone. It's quite peculiar how your instintcs react so quickly and they spot something you're interested in. It's funny. I guess my friend was right, in a way you're always looking for someone. Odd.

Anyways, I saw him, just sitting there, reading a book of all thing. He had these extremely cute little round glasses and he looked so innocent in this almost abandoned underground train car. I decided, almost on impulse, to rush over and get into that car. The one were HE was sitting in and reading his book at 11:30pm at night.

As I went in I decided to go for the kill, and even though almost the entire car was empty I sat exactly in front of him (I don't like to beat aroudn the bush too much... well, sort of, but since I was a little tipsy I felt brave, haha). So as I sat down I saw how he immediatly perceived my presence. I saw his eyes looking around and seeing all the empty tube seats around me (English people seem to try to sit as far away from eachother as possible, btw). I saw him lift his head and very discretely glance aournd, trying to catch a glipmse of who had decided to sit directly opposite his seat. I was looking around and doing the same, and our eyes met for a split second. This was exactly what I wanted and he worked with me perfectly, it was like we were waltzing. He quickly looked back at his book.

This was a critical part of the dance. I began to look straight at him. For two reasons. First, I wanted to finish cehcking him out. And what I saw, I liked. As the train began moving I saw he had on this beatiful long dark grey coat, a very nice long light gray knit scarf and a beige sweater. His hair was nice and black, his skin white and it looked like he had blue yes (but his little glasses made it hard to see). Secondly, I was staring because I know that even when you're turned away from someone, you can always feel the deep penetration of a direct glance. It's like an instinct we have, to know when we're being observed. It must be a vestigial sixth sense from the days when we were commonly hunted. As this guy was being.

I actually began to feel my heart beat faster. The thrill of the hunt always gets my blood racing. I feel scared and anxious and scared and nervous and scared. But outside, fortunatley, poker face. Or so I like to think. Anyways, the train began to stop as we were approaching the next station. I wondered where he was going to get off (hee, hee, no pun intended). The, suddenly, to my horror, I see him prepare to get off, I see him close his book and begin to hold the arms of his seat in order to propel himself upward. DAMN. It's too soon darling, this is our chance, this is our moment, don'tleave! What about "us"? Don't you believe in "us"???? AAAAHHHHHHH!!!

Of course there is no "us", other than in my lightly inhebriated mind. I realize I've been kind of silly and decide to give him permission to leave. Then I laugh at this last thought and just stay silent. As he is lifting himself from his seat he shoots a glance straight at me. Just like that. Oh boy. Ok, darlings... maybe this doesn't sound like much if you're a hetero, but in the gay world, a single glance like that, precisely when you're leaving, means A LOT. But I doubt. I'm not sure, he looks so decent and proper, so nice. So un-cruising like. He exist the car to my right. Did I misinterpret? The image of his eyes looking at me is burned into my mind and that's all I can see. I only have a few more seconds to move before the train doors close. What should I do? I mean, technically I have a boyfriend (who I HATE right now, mind you), technically I'm thorugh with men for a while and want to remain uninvolved for the time being, technically I'm against casual sex. It's amazing all the things that go through your head when you have so little time left to make an important decision. So I decide. And the doors close. And I sigh. With fear. I'm outside of the car as it begins to move. Now, where did he go?

I take the nearest exit (marked "Way Out" here in England), an I manage to see the back of his coat as he's going up the escalator. Damn. He's not waiting for me. Shit! I misread the signs. Shit. I'm a lousy gay guy. Now I have to wait for the next train. Shit, shit, shit. I almost look at him in disdain. Damn you, cute guy. Damn you. He stops and looks behind. He sees me. He does a double take (this is actually priceless, darlings). This is when I recall the wonderful little moments that make life worth living, small delicious little moments like this one, small and precious, like violet petals, so small you want to collect them in a jar and keep them forever (Cruz).

His name is David.


  • At December 05, 2004 1:57 PM, Blogger psesito said…

    ¡MALDITO! ¡TE ODIO! Y luego criticas a uno porque no termina las ideas.... ash. ¡Quiero saber qué sigue! ¡Qué emoción!


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