Feathered fiends

Sunday, May 01, 2005

As I went around the corner from where I work to get my freshly squeezed orange juice in a bag from a house that sells it our of its front door (the whole putting beverages in a bag is sooooo cool, if somewhat less portable, hahaha... I had only seen it in Mexico City) I came upon a rooster that was roaming the streets of Vallarta.

This isn't exactly a rural part of town, it's right in front of the Sheraton hotel and next to the city’s main Sporting Facilities and Stadium. Anyways, there was a damn rooster walking around.

I have to admit I've always been fond of poultry. They move really funny and make neat sounds. Anyways, I stood my ground and saw the rooster stand his. He began walking, keeping an eye on me. Unfortunately, his was walking in the direction back to my work, so I had to "follow" him. This obviously startled the animal, so he began walking faster. I stayed at the same pace. He turned the corner, so did I. Then he jumped up on to a chair and was looking right at me, ready to attack! And I was all like "You better bring it, you feathered freak, 'cause it's already been brought'n! BRING IT ON!!!" Suddenly, his "owner" came out of the gate of his house, picked him up, and took him inside. Tragedy averted.

Today, as I went to get some yummy (and quite spicy) barrio, I heard a strange high pitched chirping from the palm trees around me. It was this thin crow-like bird yapping its head off. I kept on my way and suddenly heard the chirping right behind my head. I turned suddenly but nothing was there. So I kept waling and suddenly heard the noise really close again, and out of the corner of my eye I saw a black winged thing fly REALLY close to my head! YIKES! I think the damn bird was convinced my handsomely combed and shiny black mane was some sort of a mate or something. RUN!!! So I did and it CHASED AFTER ME!!! YIKES!!! There I was, running down the main hotel zone avenue being chased by some damn raven. "Never more... never more... never more, you dirty whore", I could have sworn it said. But maybe it was just me panicking. I finally saw it retreat and I blew a sigh of relief. Then ate a whole bunch of birria, haha.

On my way back I decided to take the opposite side of the street. About a block away from my work I suddenly hear the horrifically familiar chirping sound right next to my head! OH NO!!! The damn thing remembered me and this time it was going to mate or die trying! HELP! HELP!!! I ran again and would occasionally turn my head and see the damn bird following me, going from palm tree to palm tree and swooping down at me! YIKES!!! Finally, it retreated in dismay.

Sorry honey, I'm just not easy. At least no that easy. You have to buy me a dinner and a movie at least. Sheesh... males.

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