Quote of the day

Friday, September 30, 2005

You make me wanna... mmMMMmmm... shake.

That time again...

I've been hornier than usual lately. I miss my bf. I'm not going to see him until October 28 (in MTY no less... MTY, here I come!!!). This has definitely put me in the mood for another really horny post. The time has come. Consider yourselves warned.

Fable

Thursday, September 29, 2005

You can look in the forest
for a secret field
for a golden arrow
for a prince to appear...
for a fable of love that will carry you!
To a moon
on a hill
to a hidden stream,
a lagoon
and a red horizon dream
silhouette,
set away from time... forever...
To a valley beyond the setting sun,
where waters shine and horses run,
where there's a man who looks for you...


-Fable (from The Light in the Piazza by Adam Guettel)

Internet baby UPDATE

Ok, here's the lowdown on the kid who was BORN in one of the internet cafés. The mother and father were on their way to the hospital at 5am and the wife REALLY needed to go to the bathroom and so headed to the damn Internet café (brilliant idea). For the record, the mother is 26 yrs old and this was here 6th (yes, SIXTH) child. Geez... contraceptives, anyone? Oh, nooooo, that's EVIL and perverted...

Anyaywas, she decides to have the kid right then and there and pulls down her denim shorts and out comes a bunch of blood, amniotic fluid and (according to sources) fecal matter. Yuck. She had the kid squatting (supposedly a more natural position than on your back, because you have gravity on your side and so you don't have to push as much), right next to the counter. Yuck.

The kid was born OK, but he was still attached to his mum by the umbilical cord, until the paramedics arrived to cut it. Yuck. Sources say they were pretty inept and nervous to boot. Anyways, thank goodness, the mum is at home, and all is well. Her son, Excel 2005, is doing well too. He also has, seriously, free Internet for life.

Indeed, what a world.

P.S. It SUCKS to be a woman. Jesus Christ.

Internet Baby

Wednesday, September 28, 2005

Ok, talk about weird shit happening, haha. A baby was born in one of the Internet Cafe's belonging to the company I work for. HAHAHA!

It all started early Monday morning when a couple was driving to the hospital. The husband was at the wheel. The would-be mother really needed to go to the bathroom so the only place open at 5am was the 24hr Internet Cafe near their house. So in goes the mother and on her way out her water broke! YUCK! The husband pleaded with her to get back into the car and ride to the hospital, but she refused to budge. The kids at the café were in shock and then someone finally called the paramedics and they came and delivered the bay right there! HA!

I'm sad to say that one doormat was destroyed during this whole ordeal, haha, and that one bright and bouncing baby boy was obtained without much trouble. My boss is bent on tracking downt his woman and taking a picture of her and the kid. There's a rumor he's going yo ask to be ther Godfather, or give him free Internet access for life, or maybe ask them to name the kid after the Internet Caf'e... or Excel or something, hahaha.

Another year, another memory...

Tuesday, September 27, 2005

Yes, Germy turned 25 yesterday. A quarter century. I really stopped giving age much importance a while ago (I remember being trauamtized when I turned 18, hahaha). Still, another year is another year, no matter how arbitrary time may seem. So, here's to me!

Thanks to all those who sent best wishes. And to those who didn't, it's also ok, I'll "remember" to forget your B-day's too... haha.

Epilogue (pt. 5)

Friday, September 23, 2005

Do you want to know what A stands for in this story? It means Angel. Because this guy is so full of an innocence and purity I recognize so much from an earlier version of myself it almost brings me to tears (yes, even after all these years). He handed me his heart, without restrictions, without fear or shame or anything else. It was “just a boy asking another boy to love him”. He won me over, in that moment. Yes, a little after “Hello”, I admit. But he won me over just the same. He’s my angel.

But I sometimes do wonder if an angel could break my heart. And I think we might have rushed into something in the heat of the moment. I’ve talked to A pretty much all week long, and, well, the truth is that we’re barely really getting to know each other. We laugh and talk about our childhoods and our school years and such; about past heartbreak and joy; favorite movies and horrible ones; this and that. The truth is that I really like this guy. The problem is we don’t live in the same city (or country!).

For now we’ve decided to take things slow and not put too much pressure on each other, which is a huge relief. After the “honeymoon” ended and I came back down to Earth, well, I started to have my doubts. And I started to feel pressured into something I didn’t really think through. So thankfully I brought it up the other day and we both felt a lot better after discussing this.

Of course I’m happy, I think about him all the time; I summon up his presence from memory and imagine I can touch him; I summon his smell and the feeling of his warm skin. But who can hold on to a memory? We’re going to see each other again at the end of October, so for now we’ll just concentrate on that and see how it goes.

I remember even recently telling a close friend how long distance wouldn’t work. I don’t know, I guess that was a fruitless plea so that, somehow, he wouldn’t get hurt. Maybe it was pretentious and foolish of me to even try. How can you stop someone from getting hurt? Only if you stop them from feeling, I guess. Love and pain are part of the human spectrum. Trying to eliminate any one of them is like trying to stop seeing the color violet while still wanting to see the color red.

I also suddenly remembered that old Germy is pretty strong after all. I remembered that I’ve been through some tough times myself, and I’ve made it through. And I’ll make it through this. I felt so fragile at the beginning of the week; I felt I needed A or I would fall apart into pieces. Thank God that passed. This whole experience has made me think a lot about what it is I really want, and how I plan to get it. Oh well, till October then…

Pt. 4

Conversation on a cell phone

BRO (Recognizing A’s cell number on his called ID, and very sleepy): Hey A, what’s up?
GERMY: Hey bro! It’s me! Germy!
B: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!!!!
G: What? Yeah, I went home with your friend. Big deal.
B: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!!!!
G: Oh come on, don’t make a fuss.
B: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!!!!
G: Geez. Ok, I’ll call you later, when you’re more awake.
B: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!!!!

I spent the night with A. The next day we actually rose pretty early. We snuggled. Ate. Talked. Saw his pictures. It was a truly great time. I tried changing my flight, but to no avail. Awwww. I was going to have to return that very night. Shit. He asked me: “Ok, so, what do you want to do? Where would you like me to take you?” To which I answered, in my own Germy way, “Well… I would like to stay here and be with you, if you don’t mind”.

Ok, I think I’ve taken long enough to tell this whole story! Geez! What happened next will be summed up in the following conversations. You can fill in the blanks by using your imagination (and intuition).

Conversation on a bed

GERMY: Ok, let’s see if I didn’t leave anything behind… there’s my bag, my backpack, sweater, cute guy, toiletries, shoes… ok, everything’s here.
A: Haha.
G: Let’s get a move on.
A: Whoa there. Before we leave, I’d like to talk about, you know, “us”.
G: (FUCK! I thought this was only a weekend fling!) Oh, umm, sure.
A: Well, I’d like to know where we go from here.
G: Oh, well, I mean, it depends, really.
A: I know, we’re not sure if you’re going to stay or not.
G: Yeah. If I were you, I wouldn’t bet on it. At least not this time.
A: That bad, huh?
G. Yeah.
A: Ok. Well, I’m sure there are plenty of other opportunities you can find to come up here.
G: (Huh? What did he just say?) Oh, well, yeah, I guess.
A: I can do all I can to help you out.
G: (Is this guy for real?) Oh, gee, that would be swell.
A: Yeah, I’d really like you to be here.
G: Yes. But you know that’s still a long shot. You understand this, right?
A: Yes. And I’d like for us to, well, continue what we started.
G: (WHAT?!?!? Is he suggesting what I think he’s suggesting?!?!?) Oh, umm, are you sure?
A: Yes.
G: (?!?!?!?!?!?!) Gee, umm, I don’t know.
A: I do.
G: (OK, time to break his heart). Listen A, I REALLY like you, ok? I really do. You’re the best guy I’ve met in a long, long time. If we decide to go into something long-distance, well, that will involve sacrifices, ok?
A: Yes.
G: Ok, good. I live in a little touristy beach town in the middle of nowhere. The beaches are beautiful and the clubs are great. And that’s pretty much it. Sure, it has the most vibrant cultural life of any beach destination, but that’s seriously not saying much.
A: Hehe.
G: Yeah, crazy. Anyways, that’s were I live. As far as I’ve seen, it’s great for a weekend fling, but there aren’t many guys who are interested or who are worth a shit for something stable and long-term. That’s my situation. Yours is quite different. You live in a rather large city with a very vibrant gay community. There are tons of young urban professionals and gazillions of cute guys. When it comes down to making sacrifices, YOU’RE the one who’s going to end up making more of them. You got it?
A: Yes.
G: (Huh?!?!? He was supposed to stop and think and look scared. SHIT!) And?
A: I want to go out with you. I want us to give this a try.
G: (HUH?!?!?) You’re asking a lot.
A: I know. I’d like us to try this. Please.
G: (What is wrong with this guy? Hasn’t he ever tried this before? Doesn’t he know how hard this is? What could possibly be motivating him to do this? What if it’s just infatuation? What if he regrets this tomorrow morning?... what if, what if, what if, what it)
A: So?
G: Yes.

Conversation on another bed

GERMY: Hey Bro! What’s up!
BROTHER: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!!!
G: Ok, could you mature for like a second?
B: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!!!
G: Ok, that’s getting old.
BROTHER: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!
GERMY: Oh, shut the fuck up!
B: Geez, you didn’t have to be rude about it.
G: Hahaha, you’re a dork.
B: I’m sorry, it’s just that… he’s my friend! And… YOU’RE MY BROTHER! AAAHHHHH-
G: SHUSH!
B: Ok, ok… I mean, sorry, it’s just a little hard to take in. I mean, he’s my pal, a really god pal. I have to SEE him every day, you’re leaving in a few hours. Come on!
G: (sad) I know.
B: Oh no. Are you guys going steady?
G: Yes,
B: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!! What the hell did you do that for?!?!?!
G: I don’t know. He just asked me in this really sweet way. I just trusted him, it was instinctive. And you know we’re not too good in the trust department.
B: True, true. Well, he’s a really nice guy.
G: *sigh* I know.
B: YECH!
G: Argh! Sush! Anyways, I don’t know Bro, am I making a huge mistake? Am I setting myself up for a fall here?
B: Yes, you are.
G: WHAT?!?! That’s not what you’re supposed to say!
B: I know, sorry. But it’s true. In a way. I’ve seen this happen before. People come together all of a sudden and on the spur of the moment they decide to go long distance. It usually ends up bad.
G: Great, thanks!
B: No, but I always tell them the same thing: “Hey, the odds are against you, human nature is against you… but if you feel this is what you want, then GO FOR IT! Don’t say no because you’re afraid. Don’t be a wuss. Take the leap, LIVE, dammit!”. And that’s the same thing I will say to you.
G :(sniff, sniff) Gee, Bro, that was really sweet. I didn’t know you had it in you.
B: Goes to show how much YOU know.
G: Arrrggghhhh!!!

Yee-ha! Ride ‘em Cowgirl! (a.k.a Pt 3)

Wednesday, September 21, 2005

So off we went to this “Cowgirls” place. I did not have much interest in going because 1) There were only going to be women singing and dancing on the bar and 2) If I had even wanted to see a strip show (which I mostcertainly did not), I’d have gone to a strip club, not to see some mediocre excuse for pole dancers, fully-clothed and with cowboy hats.

So we went in and we all stood right in front of the bar. There were like 3 girls kind of dancing… and I mean kind of. They looked bored and tired. And it was like 10:30pm. Come one! Then, all of a sudden, this thin, beautiful and vivacious black diva stood up on the bar with them, pulled out a microphone and started belting out this wild country song. Suddenly the Cowgirls came to life and started shaking their butts to the tune. The black girl was awesome! And so was “Estrellita” (little star), the platonic love of one of my brother’s friends. Later on all the Cowgirls did a rendition of “I love rock n’ roll”, standing all in a row on the bar. It was wild! They were all really close together and still managed top pull of some tricky choreography (all while standing on a slippery and narrow bar! Wow!). Needless to say, I was impressed.

While all the guys were gawking, me and A started chatting; first about trivial things, then a little more intimate stuff. I asked him when he had come out to his friends and how long he had been going out and stuff. He was all sweetness and cuteness and stuff. Awwwww. Like I said, this guy practically had me BEFORE “Hello”. Then the guys all bought me a “shot”. FUCK. This was crazy. Some girl in little cutoff denim shorts and a very small top brought over a bottle of Jack Daniels, poured some into a shot glass, did some nasty stuff to me (among kissing, fondling and such… to the huge amusement of the rest of the guys, haha, sheesh), and finally let me have my shot. You know, it was strangely arousing… in a very gay way, though! Haha. So, as the Cowgirls were all performing “Man, I feel like a woman”, I went to the restroom… and made a HUGE line! And the women’s bathroom was empty! What the fuck?!?!

Anyways, when I came back, all the guy’s were going crazy! I asked what had happened. My brother told me that his friend, who was Estrellita’s #1 fan, was talking to this other girl (who was, by my brother’s account, kind of chubby and not-too-pretty); anyways, while they were both in conversation, Estrellita sent the club’s bouncers to kick her out! WHOA! NO WAY! That was SOOOOO cool! Hahahaha. Estrellita apparently didn’t like other girls trying to hook up with her fans, haha. I took that as a sign that the best had passed and it was time to make our disappearance. So we did. I asked my brother if it was OK with him (you know, me leaving with his gay buddy in front of everyone). He was cool about it (or so I thought) and we left.

We first went to a swanky gay lounge place. It was all white and elegant and shit… except for the people, haha. There we met up with some of A’s friends. They were quite a rowdy bunch. And they were really drunk, so they were even MORE rowdy, haha. I think it’s funny the way some gay guys are really comfortable hugging and fondling each other. I have nothing against this. Except when they’re touching MY FUTURE BOYFRIEND!!! Grrrrrrrrrrr… Ok, this is actually where A started to falter a bit. He would later tell me it had been because he was nervous and didn’t know what to say, but he began telling me “Oh, look, that guy’s cute”. And I was all like “Oh, ok. Cool”. His stock was dropping fast. I chatted up with his friends for a while and kept a cool distance. He was being punished for his folly.

We then all made our way to another more earthy bar. It was less pretentious and a lot bigger and cozier. And we all hit the dance floor. Even though the music tended a lot towards dance and lyric-less tunes, it was pretty fun. The some of his friends started to leave. I was having such a good time, I didn’t really care if A was there or not (REALLY!), and sometimes didn’t notice when he would leave for the bathroom or for a drink (ok, that was a lie, haha). As his friends began to leave, he got to dancing with me, and it was great. I showed him some of my best moves (guys really dig when you take the lead and twirl them around, haha). Anyways, when we finally got tired we went to sit down. As we were heading to the table section, he lead me and took me by the hand. Remember I said looking into someone’s eyes was a really aggressive (and assertive) form of communication. Well, touching someone’s hand also falls in this category. I mean really, your hands are practically your most sensitive extremities (almost!), so you can imagine what a rush I felt. But I kept calm, I didn’t want to rush to any conclusions. We chatted a bit, about the music, the city, the life. When a favorite song of his came on, we returned to the dance floor.

Ok, this was when I made my move. When we made our way back. I know lead him by the hand. It was sort of an acknowledgement, a form of positive feedback (always very important). He followed me with no problem. Good boy. Then we danced and danced and danced. And in one of those patented Germy moves, we held both hands for a sec. And we looked at each other. And that was it. He was mine. And I was his.

Wha?!?!

Ok, read this paragraph (regarding the surprise blockbuster hit of the summer, the French documentary "March of the Penguins"):

These penguins get around. They switch mates with each new mating season, which makes for some pretty slutty birds -- and change the operative question from 'What Would Jesus Do?' to 'Who Would Jesus Do?'


What the fuck is wrong with these people?!?!? It's actually an answer to the religious right's use of the movie as a symbol of "monogamy, family values and anti-abortion" sentiments. These people seriously need lives...

I know what you did last weekend (Pt. 2)

Ok, even my mom has something to do with this story. Can you believe?

Before coming to visit me, my mom stopped by my brother's apartment (in a faraway country) in her now annual international brother-tour. She hung out with some of his friends and, among them, A (my new boyfriend, for all of those who didn't pay attention). She mentioned how she had met him a year earlier and how different he looked. She said he had lost a lot of weight and that he looked really handsome. She was quite insistent on this fact and, if I hadn't known any better, I might have suspected my mom was trying to sell a guy on me. Good thing I didn't suspect this, having your mom recommend a guy is a real turn off.

My brother had already mentioned A had lost almost a third of his body weight while he was participating in a nutritional and exercise program at work. I had thought "Oh, cool". I mean he was pretty chubby when I met him, but, like I said, Germy has always kind of been turned on by "full-figured" guys, so I never really saw it as an impediment. Honest. Then I actually saw pictures of how he looked now... WOW! YEE! WHOA! GEEZ! NO WAY! OH MY GOD! NAAAAAAAAHH! OH MAN! Seriously, I mean even his FACE changed. It was incredible. Now he looked, well, hot. Yum. If he had sparked my interest before, now he had set me ablaze. I knew I would see him last weekend, so I was a Germy with a mission. To accentuate this, I will sing a few bars from Stephen Sondheim's Academy Award winning song "Sooner or later", made famous by none other than Madonna in the film "Dick Tracy":


Sooner or later you're gonna be mine,
Sooner or later you're gonna be fine.
Baby, it's time that you face it,
I always get my man.

Sooner or later you're gonna decide,
Sooner or later there's nowhere to hide.
Baby, it's time, so why waste it in chatter?
Let's settle the matter.

Baby, you're mine on a platter,
I always get my man...


It was clear. This guy was toast. He had no choice but to fall hopelessly in love with me. Just like all of you Germy-blog fans did.

HA! Ok, not really. I honestly had no idea what to expect (really, Serge!). I thought he was a nice guy, really cute, I knew he was smart and earned a lot of money, tall, handsome. What was not to like?

Anyways, when we finally met up again, well, things went pretty smoothly. Sort of. While I was chatting alone with my brother, A called my brother up on his cell phone. "Ooohhh, smooth", I thought. He then asked to speak to me and we chatted a little. He then casually mentioned that he would like to take me to a gay bar in town. I remarked, very cool and controlled: "Oh, sure". The trap was set.

The next night we all went out to dinner: my brother, his friends (including A) and me. It was a nice place, and they had a huge wine list. I politely told the waiter: "No wine for me, thank you very much, I want cheap booze, please." Haha. During dinner I sat almost directly in front of him. I had wanted to sit next to him, but the über-geeks beat me to the spot. FUCK! Anyways, this position turned out to be better because I was able to stare right at him. It's incredible; a stare is a very aggressive form of communication. Few animals in nature can stand a direct stare. We humans are not one of them. Looking someone straight in the eyes can be terribly intimidating (like I so remembered last Friday night). But, also, it can be very assertive and can speak, well, a thousand words. And it did.

I went to the bathroom, innocently (REALLY!). When I came out of the stall he was taking a leak. I thought "YESSSSsssssSSSSSSssssSSSSSS. Smart boy." So as I was washing my hands, and he was finishing up, I casually remarked "So, are you ready to go to that damn 'Cowgirls' place?" (My brother's friends were bent on going there, a "Coyote Ugly" type bar with dancing and singing bartender cowgirls). Remember, he already knew I was gay, so this was my chance to "plot" something. He said "Well, kind of. We can go somewhere else afterwards if you want." He was going along beautifully. I then answered "Hey, sure. Let's go with them and then we can make our getaway". We then shared a smile of complicity. Oh boy... what a world.


P.S. My mom is still in Europe and I wrote to her telling her me and A had actually hooked up. She was glad, and casually mentioned my ex (who was a total dear with her whole she was in London) had sent me a book as a present with her. She said he had written a very "affectionate" note for me inside. She immediately added that she had only poked inside because she had had to unwrap the present while she was going thru customs... yeah right. Anyways, to this news I immediately thought: "Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. FUCK."

How

Tuesday, September 20, 2005

How do you take an e-commerce site that stinks and turn it into something that is competitive on an international level?

One day at a time. One error at a time. One button at a time. One feature at a time. One programmer at a time. C'est la vie...

Musical interlude of the day...

GERMY:
I feel pretty,
Oh, so pretty,
I feel pretty and witty and GAY!
And I pity
Any girl who isn't me today.

GERMY FRIEND CHORUS:
Have you met my good friend old Germy,
The craziest boy on the block?
You'll know him the minute you see him,
He's the one who's in an advanced state of shock.

He thinks she's in love.
He thinks she's in Spain.
He isn't in love,
He's merely insane.

GERMY:
I feel dizzy,
I feel sunny,
I feel fizzy and funny and fine,
And so pretty,
Miss America can just resign! (Bitch!)

I feel stunning
And entrancing,
I feel like running and dancing for joy,
For I'm loved
By a pretty wonderful boy!


-Stephen Sondheim (sort of, haha).

What the hell happened last weekend Pt.1

Monday, September 19, 2005

Ok, this whole story began over six months ago, so as you can guess, there was a lot of inertia here. For simplicity, my new boyfriend's name will be A.

I went to see my brother back in march and met one of his friends (A). He was a school chum of my brother’s in college (I have absolutely NO recollection of him whatsoever, but A claims he knows me and said hi to me on several occasions and I never even turned his way. Oops...). Now they work at the same place and hang out with the same group of slightly geeky guys, haha. Anyways, A seemed like a nice guy (HELLO! That meant GAY! How could I have been so naive?!?!), but, like I said, I didn't suspect at first because 1) He was with this girl the whole time and 2) Computer Science guys completely blur my gaydar.

Like I mentioned, it was only a few days later that I found out the damn girl was a visiting friend (i.e. a typical great looking fag hag). And after that it wasn't until June that my brother told me his buddy A was gay. To which I internally uttered "FUCK!!! I coulda had me some of that!!!". At least in theory.

It was pretty funny the way A came out to my brother. He had already told some of their other buddies, so he approached my brother with some other guys who already knew. He told my brother that he was traveling to San Francisco the following weekend. My brother realized it was the last Sunday in June and said "Oh, you're going to the Gay Pride?" and A answered, quite enthusiastically "YES, I am! Finally! Somebody got it". Then my brother asked "Oh. Why are you going to do that for?", after which A slapped his hand against his forehead "WHY?!?!?!". All the other guys said, in unison, "Because he's gay! He's trying to tell youuuuuuu". My brother then fell into total shock, haha. It could have been worse. Another guy A told stared at him blankly and asked “What’s a gay pride?”.

What a world...

And the beauty is (reprise)

A reprise...

This is wanting something, this praying for it,
This is holding breath and keeping fingers crossed.
This is counting blessings,
this is wondering when I’ll see that boy again.
I’ve got a feeling he’s just a someone, too.
And the beauty is... when you realize...
when you realize...
Someone could be looking for a someone like you.

-The beauty is
(from The light in the piazza, by Adam Guettel)

The absolute cutest thing in the world is...

... baby seals splashing on the shore. I saw them on TV and I almost cried. Seriously. Ok, not seriously, but they were seriously too cute for words. Awwwwww...

Charity

Yesterday was the "Condom Fair" on the Malecón. The AIDS organization where I volunteer organized it, and I stopped by to help haggle people to donate. It was funny, some guys contributed just to get their hands on free condoms, haha. Some queer-looking tourists actually gave a lot of money. How sweet...

And we totally smoked the guys asking for money right next to us. They were raising funds for some little kid so he could get some kind of transplant to hear. Poor shmucks, all they did was put up some signs and waited or people to read them and donate by their own good will. PLEASE. We were 5 people strategically harrasing anyone who came near; we were ruthless.

Anyways, I honestly don't think this type of events are worth the effort. They really don't raise that much money and they are a lot of work. Plus, two people got pooped on by birds! The humanity!!!

I'm trying to think of a better idea, that can raise the funds necessary for the cause and also be efficient and not just standing in the sun and rain for hours on end.

Anybody got any ideas? They're more than welcome...

Weekend

Sunday, September 18, 2005

Whoa. That was quite a weekend. My head is still spinning.

I'm outraged and appalled
Distressed and offended
Scandalized, mortified
Shocked and upended

I sort of had expectations, I mean I can't say I didn't. I met this guy six months ago, and only later found out, through my brother, that he was gay. I was all like "DAMMIT!". My gaydar is usually good, but he was with this pretty girl the whole time, so it sort of put me off. I only later found out that she was a friend who was visiting and that she already had a boyfriend. Whew...

I'm fretted and anxious
Concerned and disturbed
Upset, apprehensive
Harassed and perturbed!

So I saw him again. He had lost almost a third of his body weight. Even though Germy likes them on the chubby side, I was willing to make an exception. I mean now he looked hot. He knew I was gay (my bro told him... and it's not like I'm so macho you can't tell, haha). And I knew he was gay. We all went to this "Coyote Ugly" still bar where the all-female bartenders occasionally got up to sing and dance. Man, suprisingly, IT ROCKED, hahaha. But still, we conspired in the bathroom to make our getaway. And we did.

I'm astonished, alarmed
Perplexed and dumbfounded
Bewildered, embarrassed
Amazed and astounded

We met up with some friends of his at a gay bar. They were so drunk, it was so funny, haha. Anyways, we remained cool and refrained. Keeping a prudent distance. How did all this happen so fast? Who knows. And then we danced.

Laughable, impudent
Brazen, audacious
Saucy, impertinent
Bold and ungracious

And danced and danced. Literally, "the night away". Fun. His friends slowly began to make their exits. We went to sit down, and he took my hand and guided me to the tables. Wow, a touch. We talked, went back to dance. And then I made my move.

I'm thrilled, I'm enchanted
Enraptured, excited
Gratified, tickled...
It's as if we collided.

We spent a night, a morning and an afternoon together. He's a big goof, haha. He's so tender and has this incredibly cute and cuddly quality that just won me over. Honestly, he had me before "Hello". He has a rich and deep voice. And he's big and strong. And he's has a even bigger heart. And he has a weird sense of humor. And he has an innocence and purity that enthrall me. And he has pale white skin... and he lives in another fucking country. What the hell am I thinking?!?!?!

I thought I was way to cynical for stuff like this to happen. I thought I was way to smart to go into something long-distance. What am I doing?

I'm charmed.
I'm disarmed.

Indeed, Germy-blog readers... what a world...

P.S. Quotes by Paul Gordon, from Jane Eyre.

And the beauty is...

Wednesday, September 14, 2005

This is wanting something, this praying for it,
This is holding breath and keeping fingers crossed.
This is counting blessings,
this is wondering when I’ll see that boy again.
I’ve got a feeling he’s just a someone, too.
And the beauty is... when you realize...
when you realize...
Someone could be looking for a someone like you.

-The beauty is
(from The light in the piazza, by Adam Guettel)

VIVA

In patriotic fervor, I just bought a 6-foot-tall Mexican flag, haha. On the night of the 15th of September, Mexico celebrates the start of the revolutionary war against Spain for its Independence which took place in 1810.

September is a month when all Mexicans become very patriotic. All feelings of inferiority and shame suddenly melt away and we all celebrate the very act that inspired the creation of a national identity. I actually think this is a welcomed attitude; defeatism and cynicism eventually get old and boring. A change indeed does us all good.

There are many myths and flat-out incongruence that marks our Independence from Spain. I won't go into any of them in detail, but I just want to say that history and historical figures are inherently mythical in their own right (i.e. lies). The fact that Mexican heroes and our history are marred by this fact only makes them more valid. History is an interpretation of reality through the eyes of people (who usually win conflicts and kill off other people who can contradict them). Who's to say they weren't caught up in patriotic fervor and while faithfully writing down "reality" fail to mention the fact that the father of our nation (and a Catholic priest) fathered many children, or that he originally campaigned for Spain against Napoleon, or that he might have only freed slaves to help make up the bulk of his army. What matters is what that man symbolized, which was (and is) a country stumbling through its first few breaths of liberty.

Spain was a treacherous and selfish mother. But we inherited many of her wonders and many of her worst faults, and we wear them proudly like a newborn tiger wears its spots. We eventually merged our European education with our ancestral pre-Hispanic origins, and created a culture so dynamic and colorful, Europe would never have been be able believe or accept it; and so incongruous and insatiable, that our indigenous fathers would have shunned us (or conquered us and ripped-out our hearts). We created a strange and un-natural hybrid; we put the symbol of our pre-Hispanic past on our flag, yet established Catholicism and Spanish as absolute religion and language; we ashamed ourselves of our indigenous background, and looked up to Spain as a symbol of all that was beautiful and cultured; we refused to learn Spanish and have kept our original language and traditions to this day; we established a strict policy of no intervention in other countries, but had no problem killing ourselves for decades; we believe in hope and union and purity; we trust no one and criticize our country every minute of every day, wishing it were better, not realizing a country begins with one's own self; we are fervently Catholic, yet spend Sundays watching soccer; we are friendly to foreigners, a symbol of our good will and trust, more so after all hell broke loose for letting the Spanish in; we love security and wealth, and are willing to leave our beloved homes, all we know, to venture off to hostile lands in search of a better life for ourselves and our families.

To all those faces of Mexico, that cry tears of joy for the birthday of a land we consider both beautiful and damned; to all those violently contradicting voices that merge into one on this eve of all eves, I join them, and say VIVA!

The joy you feel

Tuesday, September 13, 2005

Though truly happy, you must beware,
for happiness can also scar
for so like me you are
...you are... beware...

-The joy you feel
(from The light in the piazza, by Adam Guettel)

Germy's resume DO's and please please please DON NOT's!

Monday, September 12, 2005

After my boss rejected BOTH candidates my gringa friend and I had screened last week, I've decided to help out those looking for jobs. And man, there are people who send LAME-ASS resumes, geez. I mean READ THEM at least guys. I know (at least CS guys) are supposed to be geeks and writing is not their strong point, but COME ON, your job might depend on this very document. Here are some tippers, direct from professional technical recruiter, Germy.

What to include
Ok, this is the stuff that needs to go in there. Do not exclude this, or else you'll look like a foo'.
Put DATES of when you were working or when you were studying. Not putting dates makes people suspicious and think you’re hiding something.

I really do have to stress something to anybody still in university: GET SOME WORK EXPERIENCE! I did and internship and a project OUTSIDE of school and they have helped me INMENSELY in getting a job once out of school. I appreciate it even more now that I've had to look at resumes full of only school projects and shit. Come on! Outside stuff shows interest and passion. That's what you want in a candidate. You want him doing this stuff outside of school, when he doesn't have to. It will be a definite plus.

What to leave out
Do us all a favor and try to eliminate jobs that have NOTHING to do with the position your applying for. SERIOUSLY. Like the boy scouts, fixing plumbing, sweeping, etc. Including random shit means you have NOTHING to say and that you just want to take up space with worthless information. Your stock goes down with the recruiter.

This also stresses another point... if you're fresh out of college, PLEASE make your resume ONE PAGE ONLY. Yes, one. Uno. Eins. 1. ONE! I'm sick of seeing people looking for their first job ever and handing-in fucking 3 page resumes! Come on! Strictly speaking, a Curriculum Vitae does have a lot of information, and that's what a resume is called in Mexico. But this is shit. Anybody who hires you on the length of your resume and not on your skills deserves to hire a loser.

My gringa pal always has a good laugh when seeing Mexican resumes. They usually have pictures, birthdays, marital status, height, weight, age, etc, etc, etc.. things that are all EXTREMELY ILLEGAL to ask in the USA when recruiting. Like I said, in Mexico the custom is to use Curriculum Viate's, which is why some of these archaic facts are included in resumes. Still, they're ridiculous. Who the hell puts a photo on their resume?? I can understand if you want to be an actor, model, anchor, stripper, etc... but for an office job? PLEASE!

Extras
On cover letters... well, if you’re good at writing and can genuinely put interesting stuff in there, go ahead. If you’re going to put in a generic mish-mash of stuff that will help someone in NO WAY to come to a decision, please, save your energy. Don’t repeat as much as highlight the stuff in your resume that is RELEVANT to the position you’re applying for. A personalized cover letter for a company and a specific position is indeed a plus. Only changing the name and position on a generic cover letter will get you nowhere... well, maybe to the trash bin.

My boss sent out a few questions about past experience, technologies and salary expectations. Almost NOBODY answered them. COME ON! If you're going to apply for a job, send them ALL the information they ask for. All these losers did was show us how un-interested they were in the position. And those who did answer them... GEEZ! Most programmers’ writing skills suck. Most of them write a lot and end up failing to answer the fucking question. Give me a break. People, programmers and all, learn how to make concise sentences! It's called fourth grade grammar! Learn it! Writing is a very important job for a developer; you have to come up with documentation that should be understandable and easy on the eyes. This skill is a HUGE advantage over the rest of the pack.

Sending it out
I hate the poor boobs who just send in their resume because the job somehow remotely resembles something they might in another lifetime be able to get fired at after one day. I actually respect these types, I've been there. But it just shows me how useless this technique is. A tip: don't waste your time, or anybody else's. Send your resume only to positions where you think you're a good match. If you match a lot, good for you. If you don't, forget it. You might be sending all your irrelevant resumes to the same recruiter, and he (i.e. ME) will not really give you much consideration for a position in which you really fit into if you've given him the impression you're just desperate for anything you can get your hands on (especially if this really is the case). Be prudent and wise.


Today’s edition of the Germy Show was sponsored in part by the letter G (for Germy!... and gay… and guy... and guppy... and gorgeous... and goofy... and glory... and glory hole... ), the letter R (for resume, relevant, righteous and r-excellent), and the number 26 and 25 (the day of my B-day and the age I will tell nobody I turned).

Thanks for watching! Good night and good luck.

Germy on recruiting

Since my boss has been up to his ass in work, I've been assigned the task of recruiting our new developers. Cool.

I got to email some people we were interested in and will be calling them later in the week. This seems fun. I don't want to be too hard, I don't want to scare them and make them all nervous; that would be counterproductive to both of us. I want to know the extent of their knowledge in web developing and database management. And see if they're assholes or not. And see if they're mentally unstable or not. And, hopefully, see if they're cute and gay... or not. Being both a hottie and queer will get you an immediate hire from Germy. ;-)

My gringa pal used to work in HR and she's pretty good at screening out losers and ex-cons. She used to have to find people for all kinds of positions, from cleaners to executives. She even used to be a headhunter, meaning she would go out and try and steal workers from other companies to fill the vacancies she was sent... COOL! Hahaha. Anyways, when we look at a resume together, she immediately goes into stealth-mode. If the guy has gaps in his resume, she starts suspecting he's been in jail or making bombs to blow-up innocent Christian gringo's or what not. I love this chick. But I feel she's not that good at technical recruiting. The experience I've had with technical recruiters have all been pretty good; they value you and your talents and always treat you very well, with the outmost respect. Some even go out of their way to make you feel comfortable (no, nobody has made a pass at me... yet). They see that techie talent is a valuable asset, and should be treated as such. This includes paying for travel expenses, moving costs, first month or two of accommodation, etc. And a competitive salary. Cheers to that!

Next up, Germy's techie resume DO's and DONT's...

Hottie of the week

Saturday, September 10, 2005

... Josh Duhamel!


Ok, I have to admit I've never seen his TV show Las Vegas or his movie Win a date with Tad Hamilton... but when I saw the trailer and TV spot for the latter... *sigh*... the sight of this up-and-coming actor had me, well, up and coming in other very different ways. Hahaha!

His smile is unbelievably sexy. I mean he could melt the polar ice caps with it; it should be labelled a WMD (Weapon of Mass Distraction). He has that really tough-guy feel to him, yet he has the warmest gaze and friendliest hazel eyes. Awwww... and I can tell that he can go from tender stud-muffin to ultra-sexy and smooth heartbreaker in the blink of an eye. *Sigh*

Oh, did I mention he's REALLY hot??? I mean his body is beautiful. It's firm and tan, not too bulky, but has nice marked muscles. YUM. I'll take him and an order of fries... and a milkshake... and plenty of whipped cream... and lube... and....... oh dear, I'm delirious with lust. Be still my heart!!!

Everyone is equal under California state law...

...it's just that some are more equal than others.

This is a very interesting article by a California state senator (it's a her, and her last name is Figueroa, who knew???). I can only hope other straight people come to their senses too.

The first of many (I hope...)

Ang Lee's tale of the homosexual love between two cowboys set in the conservative West of the 1960s (Brokeback Mountain) won the Venice Film Festival's top award Saturday.
-Associate Press

See full article here. Hope this is the begining of a trend...

Germy, the ideal HR guy

When people continually send emails to the entire staff mailing list demanding their staplers be returned to their desks, you kind of wonder if their priorities are a little, well, out of place.

Fighting over staplers? Don't you have anything more important to do?!?!?! Oh, you don't? Then, you're dead weight... YOU'RE FIRED!!!!

Psst, psst...

The silent roomie is moving out this weekend. And he contacted my boss to meet with him before he leaves.

If you've been paying attention to the Germy-blog, you'll recall that the silent roomie left my company rather abruptly, and only told the editor, not his real boss. And he did this on the actual day he was leaving. And after repeated requests, he never acepted to meet my boss afterwrads,not even to pick up his last paycheck (can anyone say "coward"?). I'm not saying I'm really brave or anything, I just think one should fess up to one's responsibilities (and I still wonder why he stopped talking to me... hmmmmm).

Anyways, now that he's leaving, and probably REALLY needs the money, he's decided to finally meet up with da boss. This wil either be a good chance to heal old injuries and leave the door open for future opportunities or the shit's really going to hit the fan. Stay tuned.

Fake Money

Friday, September 09, 2005

You know, since Barely Legal Internet Boi (who currently shares the office with me) is in charge of counting the daily intake for the company, I've come across quite a few counterfeit bills. I'd never really seen "real fakes" before. Haha.

Some really look like made-at-home ink-jet quality stuff. I mean c'mon, the stupid kid at the register who took the bill was either really distracted, really stupid or in cahoots with the counterfeiters. Others, well, geez, they look like the real deal (at least to untrained eyes). Some even manage to fake the little thread woven inside the bill. Yikes!

What a world...

My MOMMY arrived ok!

Thursday, September 08, 2005

My mom arrived today in London. Everything is A-OK!... now. Her flight got in REALLY late and since the old ex was kind enough to go pick her up, well, he didn't find her (she arrived much later and on a different flight... oops).

Anyways, all is well now. The ex eventually caught up with her (good work!), she's at home with a frined who lives in central London and so far so good. 2 more weeks to go. Sheesh.

Btw, thanks Pooky!!! I really owe you one now.

Quote

Wednesday, September 07, 2005

If you reach for the stars, all you get are the stars,
but we’ve found a whole new spin: if you reach for the heavens,
you get the stars thrown in!

-Mary Poppins

"I can see clearly now, the rain has gone..."

Germy got his new glasses today. HOO-RAY! My old pair was starting to go out of style. The change had nothing to teh fact that I had trouble seeing my boss' SUPER TINY screen resoltion. Honest.

To my utter horror, I realized I got even blinder in the last year. That's the problem with working on a computer all day... and blogging, I guess. Arrrggghhhh! Also to my utter horror, I realized (with my spiffy new ultra-clear vision) my gringa friend was a white blue-eyed gringa!!! OH MY GOD!!! All this time I thought she was a fellow "paisa" faking a crappy Spanish accent... oh, the humanity!!!

Brokeback Mountain

YES! This is FINALLY here!!! Gay web sites have been tracking this film for over a year. Now the trailer has arrived! YES!

It's a movie about a pair of cowboys who become really good friends. Until they fuck. Then they becomes lovers, haha. It stars Heath Ledger and Jake Gyllenhaal (resident hottie of the YEAR) as the couple in question. It's directed by Ang Lee (Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon, Sense and Sensibility and The Ice Storm, among others). The screenplay is penned by Pulitzer Prize winner E. Annie Proulx (The Shipping News), among others.

This is not another independent gay love story flick. It's a big budget studio production with big names attached to it. Could this be the future of queer cinema? Morphing into mainstream cinema?!?!? We'll just have to wait (and drool!) and see...

P.S. Jake is a LOT hotter (and whole bunch more damn cute) than Heath Ledger, HELLO!!!

GDL pt. 3

Tuesday, September 06, 2005

Finally, it was my turn for the interview. Up I go to the window. I was a little apprehensive and the lady who was interviewing was young and looked a little bitchy. She took my passport and saw it had been issued in London. She asked me if I had been living in London and I answered “Si” (they interview you in Spanish, how cute!). Then she asked “DOING WHAT?!?!?” and I was all like “Ummm… NOT working illegally, I SWEAR!!!!”… haha, ok, ok, I didn’t say that (Thank God!), I just said “Clases de inglés” (which was not a lie). To which she responded “OH… so we can do this in ENGLISH then???”. And I was all like “BRING IT ON, BITCH!!!!”. After that things went by really smoothly. I’m not sure if my spiffy clean suit and tie had anything to do with it, or maybe it was the name dropping. All I know is that I was not asked for ANYTHING other than my passport. No pay slips, no proof or travel, no proof of education, nothing. So who knows, really…I was told I would get my shiny new visa stamped on my passport the very next day. Hoo-ray! Germy can now visit (and shop in) the USA!!! Among other things…

That meant I had to spend the night in GDL. Alone. In a hotel room. Hmmmmm… anyone for some casual sex??? My silent roomie had commented on some neat gay clubs in the city; I thankfully remembered their names. There was also a gay club/coffe house nearby. Or maybe I could just go to an internet café and hook up online. The possibilities were endless. But I took none of them.

Ok, ok. Let me give some context first. I had to wake up that day at 4:30 am to catch the 5:30am bus to GDL from Vallarta. After NOT sleeping on the bus I made my way to the consulate and just waited forever. I was in there over 3 hours and I was tired, nursing a nasty cold/fever and it was raining lightly when I walked out. I just wanted to crawl into a bed and not wake up for a LONG time. Yes, even though the possibilities in a city that size were huge, I had ZERO energy to even get out of bed once I shacked up in a hotel two blocks from the consulate. Yes, a more party-minded and thrill-seeking person would not have bothered with physical limits, but Germy is not that person. Besides, I called my mom and she told me not to go out. See, I also didn’t’ go out because my mommy told me not to. So, no; sadly this story does not end with me fucking a stranger. Next time, next time…

One thing is sure, tho… I LOVE GDL!!! The feel, the people, the city! It sure makes Vallarta seem like a scrawny little town. But coming home was very welcomed, too. Cheers to that…

GDL Pt. 2

Monday, September 05, 2005

Ok, so off I went to the US Consulate. A consulate is like a little Embassy, it has a lot of the same faculties (gives passports to citizens, helps them out if they’re in trouble, gives visas to foreigners), but none of the really big ones. Anyways, there I was. The neighborhood is this beautiful old part of town, full of enormous prehistoric palazzos. One of them is the consulate.

So after getting a quick bite to eat, I went at my pre-disclosed time. The line wasn’t as long as in TJ or MTY, so that was good. Once inside, tho, it was HUGE. And apparently the consulate workers were at their lunch brake, so had just resumed operations after practically halting them completely. COME ON! That’s so third world. I remember I went to get an internship visa and they did the exact same thing and I was all stressed because I had a final in the afternoon and feared I would be late. They eventually came back and all was good. Same thing happened here.

So after like 2 hours of waiting, I got my digital picture taken and my fingerprint scanned (that is SUCH a nasty feeling, damn gringos; I hear Brazil is also forcing just American citizens to have their fingerprints taken… like criminals… HA!). SO, off I go to wait for my interview. It’s a funny thing, but the people who take your fingerprint and photo and normal Mexicans, but the visa interviewers are all gringos… and they’re also encased behind this huge concrete wall and you can only see them behind these glass windows, and you have to speak to them via microphones, and you can only hear them via a speaker. So they’re physically cut off from us dirty and poor Mexican people. Yes, the Mexicans who worked there could also go behind the barrier, but it was just an odd first impression.

While I was waiting I saw this guy get rejected and it made me all nervous. I honestly think I’m a really easy case, I’ve had a visa all my life, I have a good job and I’m making decent money, I have an engineering degree, I’ve traveled a lot, I’ve held a working visas before, etc, etc, etc. But still, the doubt was there. For other reasons as well, which I won’t go into right now. My mom told me to go using my suit so as to look really sharp and professional. I laughed at the idea; but she said my cousin had taken his unmarried unemployed single-mothered sister to get a visa (really hard case, honestly) and, according to my mom, since they had dressed really nice, they had been treated very well and given the visa. I really doubted that was the reason, but I decided to respect my mom’s wishes. Being there, I felt like a stuck-up dork next to a bunch of normally dressed people. Yeah, there were like 3 or 4 guys in suits… but we were like 300! Sheesh...

(to be continued...)

New roomie

The new roomie began moving her stuff in this weekend. She's actually a friend of the Talented Mr. Ewing. The old "silent roomie" is moving out in one week.

And, by the way, her boyfriend is, well, umm... yummy. Haha, I think we're going to get along just fine... ;-)

My backyard

Sunday, September 04, 2005


Yes, you can all now die of jealousy.

OH NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!

Friday, September 02, 2005

Speaking of getting hitched... my brother is going to propose to his girlfriend this weekend...

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

GDL pt. 1

Hello to all! Germy is trasmitting live from the BEE-U-TIFUL city of Guadalajara! The second largest in Mexico and a meer 5 hours from Vallarta (which seems like an eternity if you're trying to sleep on a bus!).

I love the tree lined avenues, the sheer size and variety! A real city! WOW! I always get a good vibe when I come here. And the guys are SOOOO pretty, haha...

What brings Germy to this fair and brilliant city? Well, I'm here to get my tourist visa for going to the USA. My last one ended in March. This is like the first time EVER that I remember not being able to fo the States. I feel so... WEIRD!

Imagine if they like reject me! That would be sooo embarrasing! Geez! And I would have to like marry my gringa friend. That would be really awkward. But necessary. Germy HAS to go to the US, sorry.

Well, wish me luck. Or at least, wish me a long ahd happy marriage! YIKES!!!